Return-Path: <nifl-ld@literacy.nifl.gov> Received: from literacy (localhost [127.0.0.1]) by literacy.nifl.gov (8.10.2/8.10.2) with SMTP id g13MH3u19980; Sun, 3 Feb 2002 17:17:03 -0500 (EST) Date: Sun, 3 Feb 2002 17:17:03 -0500 (EST) Message-Id: <5.1.0.14.2.20020203170947.00a4e040@mail> Errors-To: listowner@literacy.nifl.gov Reply-To: nifl-ld@literacy.nifl.gov Originator: nifl-ld@literacy.nifl.gov Sender: nifl-ld@literacy.nifl.gov Precedence: bulk From: clifwillard <clifwillard@home.com> To: Multiple recipients of list <nifl-ld@literacy.nifl.gov> Subject: [NIFL-LD:3888] Re: ADHD labeling X-Listprocessor-Version: 6.0c -- ListProcessor by Anastasios Kotsikonas Content-Type: text/plain; charset="us-ascii"; format=flowed X-Mailer: QUALCOMM Windows Eudora Version 5.1 Status: O Content-Length: 3077 Lines: 65 Sue, Well said. When I hear, " I can't ... because I am ADHD" I ask why can't you...? The answer is usually, "I don't know, I just can't." Ok, then what do you think you can do about that? How can you do things differently so that you can...? What would you like me to do? What can you do? There are always effective coping strategies, we just need to look and not get defensive. Clif NON ILLEGITIMI CARBORUNDUM At 08:01 PM 2/2/02 -0500, you wrote: ><snip> I've also seen times when a kid would use his > label as a cop out, saying "I can't be expected to remember my assignment > because I have ADHD." I don't think that's particularly helpful to anyone. > Of course, maybe what I should do is start saying the same thing, "Johnny > can't be expected to remember his assignment because he has ADHD." But then, > wouldn't I be the one copping out? > > Tom ><End of Tom's snipped message> > I have always wondered why people use "remember" with "be responsible > for" interchangeably. > > I am infinitely better off reminding myself that "I can't be > expected to remember this assignment because I have a disgusting excuse > for a memory." This is not to be confused with "I can't be expected to > be responsible for completing and handing in this assignment." The next > part of that statement is "So what am I going to do about it?" > > I can promise you, saying "I can't be expected to remember" something is > not a cop-out, it's a > straight-out statement of fact. I would dearly, dearly love to change > it. Call it ADHD, whatever. IT's just a fact. Not a decision, not a > choice. > >I read Elizabeth Daniels Squires for sympathy and laughs (mysteries with a >sleuth wiht no memory; Ms. Squires has severe memory deficits herself). > > It's when you don't get to that second part that there's a > problem. OR, when you don't even get to the first part, and keep > getting set up for failure. > > My sister once said to an excuse making coworker, "My sister forgets > things too, but she takes > responsiblity for it." That's the best I can do. Part of the > responsibilty is acknowledging that "I can't be expected to remember > [insert event/responsiblity here]." I can be responsile for calling > myself on the phone and leaving a message, of course -- but that's not > "remembering." That's being responsible for fulfilling the responsiblity. > > To say "I'm ADHD, so I can't be expected to be responsible" -- the reply > to that is to say "then we can't be expected to give you those > responsibilities and the freedomes that accompany them." It may not be a > choice. Where I taught, those students got assigned to study > hall to do the homework assignments they would otherwise forget. Some > kids suddenly developed better memories; many others developed strategies > to get the work done. And some spent a lot of time in study hall. NOt > as punishment for bad character; just as a logical way for the school to > fulfill its responsibilities in teaching. > > Sue JOnes
This archive was generated by hypermail 2b30 : Fri Jan 17 2003 - 14:41:14 EST