[NIFL-WOMENLIT:1386] Re: Cultural Dynamics

From: AWilder106@aol.com
Date: Thu Apr 19 2001 - 07:57:20 EDT


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From: AWilder106@aol.com
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Subject: [NIFL-WOMENLIT:1386] Re: Cultural Dynamics
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Dear H--

I think it is I who should thank you for being responsive to this question.  
The only thing I can think of is something along the lines of--do you know 
anyone you would like to live with for the next ten years?  This could be 
anyone, of course.  Then you would think about the qualities the other person 
would have that would make you happy to live with them for the next ten 
years.  

I've given this matter a lot of thought because I've been thinking about 
getting MARRIED again.  For the last 15 years or so I have had graduate 
students, 2 at a time, living in my home, and I have a lot of models of good 
and not so good behavior!  So I am drawing from examples I know. Maybe your 
students could, too.

Examples:  someone to share household expenses (split cost of additional 
electricity to a room) to do their share of the chores (bagging the 
newspapers) to be whimsical (takes many agreeable forms), to be thoughtful 
(paying rent on time and apologizing if they don't), to be friendly in the 
morning (saying hello and sharing the newspaper).  

I'd be really interested to know what works for you and your students.  I'm 
sure I could learn something from you and them on this topic since I have had 
to do so much relearning myself about what to expect from "ordinary" 
relationships.

Andea



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