[NIFL-WOMENLIT:3090] Re: Question

From: Jenny Horsman (jhorsman@idirect.com)
Date: Wed Dec 08 2004 - 22:56:02 EST


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From: "Jenny Horsman" <jhorsman@idirect.com>
To: Multiple recipients of list <nifl-womenlit@literacy.nifl.gov>
Subject: [NIFL-WOMENLIT:3090] Re: Question
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I went back to have a look at those messages - I couldn't find anything
useful in the earlier discussion as the messages were primarily about the
legal system. 

The approach I have heard for the situation described here is to respond
with a comment such as: "I don't know how you got those bruises but I want
to tell you that I don't believe anyone deserves to be hurt and there are
resources to help women who are being hurt....."  and even to go on and talk
more about the services you know about, why you like them.... etc. I like
this way because it bypasses the: "it was an accident type response" doesn't
try to argue just says if..... then......... 

Such an approach gives food for thought without pressure - later the person
might come back and ask more. 

The other thing I think is important is that there is lots of info. in the
program anyway that makes it clear that violence is never OK - posters,
pictures, flyers... and lots of easily available and obvious (so you don't
have to ask anyone for it) info. on where to go to get help of various
sorts. 

One program I know has a poster and flyers in the washroom - then women can
read it and take the flyer without fear of anyone seeing or asking
questions. The more the issue of violence is ordinary and recognized as a
big problem in a program the less it feels as if the only intervention is if
there is a direct conversation. 
 
The resources that Susan Hayden recommended and the websites might be good
possibilities to have on hand and visible in the program. 

Good luck with taking up this issue sensitively and supportively in a way
that is non-judgmental. 

Jenny Horsman
Spiral Community Resource Group
www.jennyhorsman.com

-----Original Message-----
From: nifl-womenlit@nifl.gov [mailto:nifl-womenlit@nifl.gov] On Behalf Of
Susan Hayden
Sent: Tuesday, December 07, 2004 5:34 PM
To: Multiple recipients of list
Subject: [NIFL-WOMENLIT:3084] Re: Question

This website addressed this topic in August.  See NIFL-WOMENLIT archives for

#'s 2992, 2989, 2987, 2986 on August 26, 27 and 29th.  You are not jumping 
to conclusions - statistics will prove that.
Please see these two websites are great starting points to help this young 
woman:
National Coalition Against Domestic Violence  http://www.ncadv.org
National Domestic Violence Hotline  http://www.ndvh.org/   The Hotline 
Advocates can refer callers
to legal agencies in their local area.
The WV Library Commission and the WV Coalition Against Domestic Violence are

placing informational display kits in public libraries so community and 
civic organizations, adult education and literacy classrooms, etc. can check

the kits out of the public library and have a local advocate come and 
present a short seminar on the topic.

Good luck.

Susan Hayden
Adult Services Consultant
West Virginia Library Commission
1900 Kanawha BLVD, E
Charleston, WV 25305
1-800-642-9021 (toll free in WV only)
1-304-558-3978, ext. 2014
haydens@wvlc.lib.wv.us
----- Original Message ----- 
From: "Daphne Greenberg" <ALCDGG@langate.gsu.edu>
To: "Multiple recipients of list" <nifl-womenlit@literacy.nifl.gov>
Sent: Tuesday, December 07, 2004 4:14 PM
Subject: [NIFL-WOMENLIT:3080] Question


>A teacher who lurks on the listserv asked me to post this for her:
> "I have a student who has been in my class for almost a year. She is 25
> and lives with her mom and step-dad.  Three times she has arrived to
> class with a black eye and other bruises on her face and body.  She
> always has an excuse and claims to be "accident-prone," but I am worried
> about her.  Is there some way that I can help her without embarrassing
> her?  I may be jumping to conclusions.  Today she gave me a very
> involved explanation about how she hurt herself rock-climbing.  Maybe
> she did, it just seems a little odd to me to have a black eye and
> bruises so often."
> Any ideas? 



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