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<DIV>Dear list,</DIV>
<DIV> </DIV>
<DIV>Here is an example of the conversion of an instruction in dense text
to an instruction with simple stick figure visuals. The
instruction with visuals is a DRAFT that might be tested with a sample of
the target audience and then given to an illustrator/editor to turn into
the finished product - a hand out page, a web page, or read on the radio.</DIV>
<DIV> </DIV>
<DIV>(Julie, I am not sure if the plain text format will allow the two pictures
included below or not. So I'll send it first without calling for Plain
Text. Please advise.)</DIV>
<DIV> </DIV>
<DIV>Background: This is only one of many instruction pieces that a group
of 18 volunteers prepared for government agencies trying to help Katrina victims
deal with health and safety problems right after the hurricane. The
problems were immediate, so the turn around time to develop the revised
instructions was less than 24 hours. (In 4 hours for the example
below.) In some cases, the revised information was available to
hurricane victims within 2 days. </DIV>
<DIV> </DIV>
<DIV>The original instruction was for people in their homes after the hurricane
hit, and then for these people as they later returned to their damaged homes.
(See Figure 1 below)</DIV>
<DIV> </DIV>
<DIV>Comments on the original instruction:</DIV>
<DIV> </DIV>
<DIV>1. Readability level of the text is approx 11th grade. Two grade levels
above that of the average adult American. And under stress, reading
skills and desire to read drop further.</DIV>
<DIV>2. The title misses the key point - this is a crisis. "How to deal
with Electric and gas utilities" sounds like calling about your utility
bill.</DIV>
<DIV>3. This 8 line paragraph presents 18 facts and actions - all of them
important. But the text is without a break to absorb the information. And
the research tells us that 18 is far to many to remember at one reading..</DIV>
<DIV>4. The text assumes that people know where their gas valve is located,
and what the turn-off valve looks like. Few do.</DIV>
<DIV>5. The bottom line: This instruction will be of little or no help to people
in crisis.</DIV>
<DIV> </DIV>
<DIV>Comments on the revision:(Figure 2 below)</DIV>
<DIV> </DIV>
<DIV>1. A new title: "Hurricane or flood: What to do about gas and
electric."</DIV>
<DIV>2. .The instruction was divided into two parts: 1)Before you leave home, 2)
Returning.</DIV>
<DIV>There is less urgency for the second part, so put that last. </DIV>
<DIV>3. Simple visuals were added showing the action (behaviors) to be
taken.</DIV>
<DIV>4. Action captions were given to each visual.</DIV>
<DIV>5. Bullet text below 5th grade readability level. Short sentences
that focus on behaviors (actions).</DIV>
<DIV> </DIV>
<DIV>Could you do something like this with one of your instructions? </DIV>
<DIV> </DIV>
<DIV>best wishes,</DIV>
<DIV> </DIV>
<DIV>Ceci and Len</DIV>
<DIV><IMG SRC="cid:X.MA1.1168562033@aol.com" style="WIDTH: 480px; HEIGHT: 141px" height=141 width=480 vspace=5 comp_state="speed" DATASIZE="25373" ID="MA1.1168562033" >Figure 1. Orig.
Text</DIV>
<DIV> </DIV>
<DIV><IMG SRC="cid:X.MA2.1168562033@aol.com" style="WIDTH: 419px; HEIGHT: 504px" height=504 width=419 vspace=5 comp_state="speed" DATASIZE="44278" ID="MA2.1168562033" >Figure 2. Revised
and including visuals.</DIV>
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