I made a mistake in not being specific enough.

I think everyone knows the rules, they just do not know they know them.
For the rules they do not know, people may know they do not know the
rules. I think this is why we are uncomfortable in social situations we
have never before been in- the fact that we do not feel we fit in
because there are unspoken rules we do not know about or do not feel we
posses a solid knowledge of how to act upon those rules.

The "rules" are not specific to poverty, but  are everywhere. But there
are rules surrounding navigating a world entrenched in poverty. and of
course, these rules are much more complex than what can be listed.

I am not so sure if your list of "rules is really what we are talking
about.


>*"If you are poor don't talk about finances in general social

circles."*

Of course people who are poor talk about finances, It is in the manner
in
which finances are discussed that are different. I think the hidden rule
is more for people who have a great disparity in income not to talk
about finances with each other in the way they talk about finances with
people closer to their income and/or class level.

How many people here have ever felt uncomfortable A) listening to people
talk about spending exorbitant amounts of money on things you would
never dream of or B) talked about spending money or saving money to
someone who could never dream of doing those things.


> *"For low-income and poor people, and perhaps some working class

people, reading is a luxury; there are more important things to do than
reading, like working to keep the lights on and food on the table.  In
other words, reading is a bourgeois activity."*

Like i said before, to me this statement is partially incorrect.
Time-wise, reading and television take the same amount of real-time.
Reading is considered to be an activity for the *educated, *which of
course, comes with its own rules.


> *"When people become educated, they change, and will look down upon

and eventually leave their families."*

I think this is less a fact, and more a fear that many people possess.

These rules are more like:
- what gang controls which neighborhood and what are their colors or
other ways of representing their gang? (making sure not to wear anything
that may put you at risk- the wrong color, a hat cocked to the side in
the wrong direction etc.- these are serious rules, you may end up dead
if you are not careful, indeed many people have)
- How do you address people of varying capacities in your world
 - How are women expected to behave (many African American women face
the
stigma of being called loud or obnoxious,or more derogatory, offensive
and condescending language simply for being more assertive than their
white counterparts, as well as women of all colors being labeled the
same way by men when they stand up for what they believe in)
- How are men supposed to behave- what are the signifiers of
masculinity, or what does it mean to be a man?
- How to address conflict, how to deal with conflict, how to engage in
conflict.
- What form of language is spoken (slang, multiple languages)
- What topics are discussed and the manner in which it is done
- eye contact and forms of respect/disrespect (depending on the
neighborhood, you may not want to make eye contact with anyone,
depending on the culture, eye contact may or may not be acceptable. In
Los Angeles, especially in the early nineties, many people in South
Central Los Angeles resented Korean-Americans for owning stores in their
communities, an issue that is extremley large and complex. Many African
Americans felt disrespected by the Korean store owners because they
would not look at theeye contact in that situation is a sign of disrespect
in Korea.)
- clothing
- body language
- who to go to for help, who to go to for justice, what to do if you
cannot find help or justice
- people's opinions on authority figures (the police especially),
people's actions toward authority figures
- navigating the blackmarket economy for both legal and illegal things
- and so much more

One must look at any 'hood as its own world with its own expectations
about behavior, just like any button-down private university.
--
Daniel Rizik-Baer
Family Literacy Coordinator
Children Youth and Family Collaborative
(818) 442-4407 cell


>  On Fri, Apr 25, 2008 at 11:34 AM, David J. Rosen

<djrosen at comcast.net>
   > wrote:
   >
   > > Daniel,
   > >
   > > You say that everyone knows th> examples of what have been
referred
   to as
   > the "hidden rules, "
   > > "unspoken rules," "prejudicial norms" or "pressures,
constraints,
   > > barriers, biases, forces, power differentials, inequities in
power
   or
   > > unfair conditions" .
   > >
   > > It might be helpful -- it certainly would to me -- if someone
would
   > > post a list of  "the [hidden] rules of persons living with the
   > > effects of poverty, the intersection of these effects with
gender
   and
   > > race and the misunderstandings these can cause in the teaching/
   > > learning process" in the U.S.
   > >
   > >  From this discussion so far, I have gleaned these as possible
   > > examples of those "hidden" or  "unspoken" rules:
   > >
   > > • If you are poor don't talk about finances in general social
   circles.
   > > • For low-income and poor people, and perhaps some working class
   > > people, reading is a luxury; there are more important things to
do
   > > than reading, like working to keep the lights on and food on the
   > > table.  In other words, reading is a bourgeois activity.
   > > • When people become educated, they change, and will look down
upon
   > > and eventually leave their families.
   > > • Working hard and studying hard may lead to success, but it
depends
   > > greatly on one's economic, ethnic, and gender circumstances.
   > > • The hidden rules for any community or culture are culturally
   > > dependent; in order to function in another culture one needs to
know
   > > what those rules are.... For example, when I visited a friend's
   > > family in a dangerous part of LA, she explained to me what the
   > > 'rules' were for a white girl at that time and in that place.
   > >
   > > What are some other unspoken rules for the poor? How do they
   > > intersect with gender and race? What misunderstandings do they
cause
   > > in the teaching/learning process?
   > >
   > > Is all of this informed by Paulo Freire?  Or is it informed by
Ruby
   > > Payne? Or someone else? It might make a difference in what the
   > > unspoken rules are. It certainly makes a difference in what you
   think
   > > we should do about the unspoken rules.
   > >
   > > David J. Rosen
   > > djrosen at comcast.net

-- 
Daniel Rizik-Baer
Family Literacy Coordinator
Children Youth and Family Collaborative
(818) 442-4407 cell
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